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Thoughts of a role-player with Asperger's syndrom and other problems.
Sunday, 2 November 2008
Have a live journal somewhere else that will get you caught up.
Mood:  quizzical

Inm shot I did well for about a year then everything fell apart, came home again, lost my Grandfather, lost two cars, lost a dog, never got a job, out of school longer then ever before and still trying to learn how to deal with Aspergers. I love roller costers, but this one hasn't eneded. 

Posted by apeman81 at 11:42 PM EST
Updated: Sunday, 2 November 2008 11:48 PM EST
Monday, 4 September 2006
Mood:  party time!
Although I can't belive I let this sli[p for nearly two years, I have some wonderful news. I am finally back a Western Michigan Univeristy. In addtion, I finally got my driver's liscense. Indeed I am doing great for once.

Posted by apeman81 at 12:21 AM EDT
Sunday, 20 February 2005
A change of name following a change of Diagnosis
Mood:  hug me
Well, last month I had some testing done with the experts at University of Michigan's Autism Center to find out what indeed is up with me.

The diffinatly diagnoised Asperger's Sydrom and stated that I was misdiagnosed with ADD for 20 years. Mo wonder everything I tried never quite worked right. I was being treated for the wrong things and turns that many of my problem, idyscrancies and fault can be laid at the foot of this upper end Autism Spectrum disorder.

I feel liek I need a hug becuase I am both angered and relieved at this. Its like doors I barely knew existed have opened for me. At long last my IT was unveiled.

Posted by apeman81 at 4:55 PM EST
Wednesday, 8 September 2004
Another month goes back yet Hope still lives on.
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: Oldies on the radio
Yep, another month goes by when I really should be using this Jouneral everyday so my fleeting thought aren;t so fleeting. At least I am listening to some music.

Apsberger's is mostly ruled out, pending more indepth testing. Its ADHD is the big ass thing till with more unknown possible. I am thinking about rereading my Milon test result, but I am not sure put the darned thing. I need a hug, but all I can do now is wait wait and hope.

Posted by apeman81 at 6:51 PM EDT
Wednesday, 11 August 2004
The uncertainty Factor
Mood:  hug me
Well, the past month or so has been the use mixed bag. I'm just so unuse to journels that its seems I can never new more then two in a row. Life is just a moment by moment things and my mind plays games with itself as the world plays with it.

My Physche doc doesn't know what to do with me other then the med I have and my theripistes hasn't been helping as much as she could and porgress has stagnated. They aren't even sure I have Asbergers even though to me is a very likely canadite. My parents are pushing to do soemthing I only half-heartedly want to do for reason thats can be fixed by a proper diagnosic.

I am going to be going to a new Doc whose a specialist in Aspergers. I'll be returning to the ADHD Group, I'll be gameing and I'll be looking for soemthing to do with my life. God help me.

Posted by apeman81 at 1:34 PM EDT
Wednesday, 14 July 2004
Another 3 weeks gone.
Mood:  irritated
Well, life's been interesting. A TG/TF board budy, Pchan has been running a D&D for the last couple of
weeks which has turned into one of the best games I have played in and being the game I was in with the fewest regular people. Since it stated I haven't done my d20 modern game and my GCP FR game has run into a plot stand still. I need to think of something quick. Right now its like driving through Wyoming, just plains man.

My parents went on a no kids camping trip and my bitch of an older sister is being a fucking nazi. I love her so but she's a primadonna Das Uberhundin. Basicly Diva Mega bitch in a mixture of Italian and German.

Last week I was dignosed with Asperger's syndrom and don't know how to fucking take it.

Posted by apeman81 at 8:22 PM EDT
Thursday, 24 June 2004
3days 3 games later
Mood:  not sure
Well, the legendary game ways just pregame set up. My Forgetten realms had it best session yet and my TF/TG d20 Modern game got off to a stupendious start.

Then why I am feeling not sure how/what I', feeling. I have a IRL game tonight that I am obligated to go to and I am starting to tire of though its actully a decent game, just not the style of group I like.

I am also conimplative with a lot of shit on my mine. I ask some people questions I never asked before and am totally uncomferitble about. I don't know what to feel. I want to try some Zen meditating techniques, but I never could in the past, though I never really tied nor really know and true technqiues. I want to they the Hypno tracks I have on my computer, but its in the basement still. Sigh, more when I think about this.

Posted by apeman81 at 2:48 PM EDT
Monday, 21 June 2004
YAWN. Mornings are interesting times.
Mood:  a-ok
Well, mistook today for one of my appointments for my theripist for this morning but I found out its for tomarrow. As soon as I get over the yawns I'll be chipper. Gives me time to really work on my games. Also Eric Z is starting his legendary game tonight, should be interests though I still need to write up the character history. At least I have enough in my head so I can role-play here. I better break out the Shakespearian insult book I bought.

Posted by apeman81 at 10:10 AM EDT
Sunday, 20 June 2004
12 day lapse.
Mood:  down
Well, had a week+ of doctor's vists, creative insperation and other stuff. Yesterday I finally started with the preludes of my TF/TG d20 Modern game. Ended up better then expected. Have a few good players which makes me happy. I finshed makeing a map for them.

My FR game was postoned due needing to have a sleep study done. Next week they'll be face and evil I am going to throw. At them. Yes, I planned a bit, but not much more. They should handle it.

All in all, my GMing skills are inproving slowly and surelys, as are my interpersonally skills and my copeing with my conditions. Still don't understand them, but at least now I am truely starting to live with them. More on this later.

Happy Father's Day!

Posted by apeman81 at 7:13 PM EDT
Tuesday, 8 June 2004
Slow day before a gameing session
Nothing much to say about to other then I had a theopy session, got a haircut, was caught in loads of traffic and not much else.

I am currently on the cusp of running the thrid session of my Forgotten realms D&D game. Got a new player bringing the total to 5. Should be fun. Was up latter lastnight working on a Legendary game character, possibly the most insane conspet I could think of, but it will be fun.

I'm still working on getting that TF game started. Other games are poping up. It summer again, so people are going to have more time, I hope atleast. No I am off to torment soem players.

Posted by apeman81 at 8:32 PM EDT

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